Unfiltered Midlife Moments & Cannabis Wisdom | Sail Across a Stormy Sea

It’s the final episode of the year, and Queenie and TT are doing what they do best—making sense of the madness with humor, cannabis, and zero patience for nonsense. This week, the Queens revisit the surprisingly powerful science of humming (yes, humming) as a stress reliever and sinus saver, reflect on collective trauma and gaslighting fatigue, and unpack the latest cannabis news—including federal rescheduling and Supreme Court silence.

They play another round of Did This Happen Stoned or Is It Kaka? (Indonesia delivers), add a brutally honest new rule to the F*** It List—stop pretending to like people you don’t—and close out the year with laughter, grief, gratitude, and real talk about boundaries, aging, and surviving whatever comes next.

🧠 Episode Summary

• Post-holiday brain fog, cookie confessions, and the emotional whiplash of end-of-year reflection
• Why humming isn’t woo-woo—it activates nitric oxide, calms the nervous system, and helps sinus health
• The shared psychological toll of misinformation, gaslighting, and prolonged national trauma
• What Queenie & TT consumed today (Floracal Sativa Pink Lemonade + Blue Razmatazz)
• Cannabis rescheduling news: Schedule III implications, banking access, and political backlash
• Supreme Court declines to hear a cannabis case—what that means (and doesn’t)
• Game Time: Did this really happen stoned?
• A village accidentally hot-boxed by drug incineration (true)
• Snortable cannabis “bumps” marketed like cocaine (also true… unfortunately)
• The F* It List:** Stop pretending to like people you don’t—and why women are trained to do exactly that
• Boundaries, guilt, politeness, and the art of being civil without self-betrayal
• Closing out the year with hope, humor, and travel dreams for 2026

Welcome to the Closet Disco Queen Pot-Cast, a #1 ranked Women in Cannabis (Feedspot, Million Pods; 2025) comedy podcast with music and pop culture references that keeps you laughing and engaged. Join our hosts, Queenie & TT as they share humorous anecdotes about daily life, offering women's perspectives on lifestyle and wellness. We dive into funny cannabis conversations and stories, creating an entertaining space where nothing is off-limits. Each episode features entertaining discussions on pop culture trends, as we discuss music, culture, and cannabis in a light-hearted and inclusive manner. Tune in for a delightful blend of humor, insight, and relatable stories that celebrate life's quirks and pleasures. Our Closet Disco Queen Pot-Cast deals with legal adult cannabis use and is intended for entertainment purposes only for those 21 and olderVisit our Closet Disco Queen Pot-Cast merch store!
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Transcript

Queenie:

Hello TT! How's it going on your neck of the woods?

TT:

Hello Queenie. It's good, you know. My youngest son will be here later today. So I'm very excited about that. I know, I know. And then the oldest will be here tomorrow, late afternoon. And of course, one of them is in town here with me. So he'll be coming over too. So it'll just be wonderful to be together. Yeah, yeah.

Queenie:

Hooray! That's great. That's how nice. Nice. Very nice. Very nice. Yes, by the time this, this episode is available, it will be the day after the big day, the day after Christmas where you're hearing, listening to us. It's after Christmas. So I hope everything went well for everybody. I've had a nice holiday. Then whatever, whatever was going on, I hope everything went well. I'm wearing one of our t-shirts.

TT:

After. Yeah. Yeah. You had a nice holiday or whatever you choose, however you choose to celebrate. That's great.

Queenie:

Joy is a stretch goal. Exactly how I feel.

TT:

Yep, Well, I'm excited this year because, know, I don't know. We'll see. Yeah, I'm home for the first time in four years. so, yeah. Yeah.

Queenie:

That'd be nice. And you're home. It's all good. It's all good. And we're gonna have a very quiet Christmas. Well, we would have had a very quiet Christmas.

TT:

Mm-hmm. You would have.

Queenie:

Well, like yesterday. Well, you know, everybody's listening to this today is the day after Christmas. So I'm saying it would have been a really small. I can't. Well, then we probably shouldn't talk about Christmas because one way or the other. It's over, Johnny. One way we're going to confuse us or the listener one way the other. So might as well just hop over. So whatever. It's that time of the year. Let's just.

TT:

Right, yesterday. Right. God, don't do this to me, please. We shouldn't. It's over. It's over and done with. Yeah, yeah we are. So, yep. Let's just move along, move along.

Queenie:

Let's just move along. Anything non-holiday related.

TT:

Me think. No, not really. I know. I know. We did get a tree. We got our tree. Got lights on it. well, it's first time we had a tree in a long time. And the prices on these live trees are outrageous. my goodness. And then, know, Honey gave a very generous tip to the guy who tied it on the car.

Queenie:

I can't believe it's like in four days, three days, four days, four days. well. you're ahead of me there. Significant. Yes, I'm.

TT:

It's like, we better enjoy this tree.

Queenie:

Hell of a tree there. Well, it is the holiday season. ha ha. Well, did make cookies last weekend and needless to say, they're all gone.

TT:

You ate them all? Okay, I would have.

Queenie:

I didn't eat them all. No, I, I, I, well, I did send some home with Mia. I did not make the cookies. I have to say Mia made the cookies. She's my little baker. She did a great job. So I sent some home with her. I brought some to a friend and yes, then I ate the rest. Thank God, only three batches.

TT:

She made the cookies. How exciting. Well, I sat down last night. I sat down last night with a container of peanut &Ms. Went through about a pound of them, think. Just, they're so good. Yeah. so good. Well, honey's gonna have to go buy some more.

Queenie:

Ooh yum yum. yeah. yeah. Yum yum. I love those things. They are delish. How can you not?

Queenie:

Surprise! You should just go to BJ's and get a big...

TT:

I know we don't have, we don't belong to BJs. I don't think we have a BJs here. We have Sam's Club in Costco, yes, but we don't have BJs. Are you?

Queenie:

Maybe Costco. we're getting a Costco. Yes, you can be multi-state, state-tui, state-like. can shop in one Costco or the other. I think you can go to any Costco. That gives you free rein to walk into any Costco anywhere. Whoa, baby. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

TT:

Really? As long as you have a card you can go anywhere? Fort Blanche. Wow. Well, it might be worth it. I hear they have good hearing aids there.

Queenie:

I wouldn't know. just, the only thing I've ever heard is that the rotisserie chicken is the best and it's $5. That's, you know, that's what I know. The best and $5. But the structure is up in right in front of Crossgate.

TT:

Yeah, that's supposed to be fabulous. Yeah. You. Cool, where's it gonna be? Okay. Yep.

Queenie:

The signs up but they're saying they won't be open till August. So, I don't know. We'll see. We shall see. But it's humongo. You know, it's a warehouse. One of those. One of those things. So, that'll do great things for that area traffic wise. Can't wait. yeah. Cannot wait.

TT:

My goodness. Huh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's not enough there already. Well.

Queenie:

Hit the old spotage. Yeah, I wasn't I didn't drink anything at my mother's. No, it's not. Chugga lugga lugga lugga lugga lugga.

TT:

That's not good. See. Mm-hmm. I know we must hydrate. So much depends upon it.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Don't we know that?

TT:

Especially at our age.

Queenie:

At our advanced age. And I just saw another article about humming. Do you know what else humming can be good for? If you hum, now you'd have to hum for a longer period of time. It's recommending five minutes twice a day. Sinus infections. Because it stimulates, the vibration stimulate something, let's see, that.

TT:

You did? Okay. Okay. Interesting. The vibrations up there, yeah.

Queenie:

Fights against the bacteria pathogens. it helps generate nitric oxide, which is what we had talked about before. the nitric oxide has antimicrobial properties that kill pathogens before infections establish. So it helps keep your sinuses clear. it's, I guess it can be considered equivalent to using like a neti pot or whatever, but that.

TT:

That's cool. I'm going to have to try that some more. OK. Well, I have to say, if you've been doing this, it's working quite well, because you sound great after you're cold. Yeah. Oh, you're a sucker, snot sucker.

Queenie:

Who, my, no, I haven't been humming. I have been using my sucker, yeah. I almost called it a nausea.

Queenie:

Something like that. yeah, that works. But I was quite fascinated with what it was getting out of there. But no, but it's clear results now. Everything's looking good. But yeah, I thought this was so you'll feel the vibrations eventually. Maybe not at first, it's up over your eyes and it will begin draining, help to drain your sciences. might take a day or two.

TT:

I don't want to think about it, please. Yeah, yeah, definitely right, right, right in here. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to do that. Five minutes. Okay.

Queenie:

So expanded humming. So maybe five minutes in the morning, five minutes in the evening. So you can maybe incorporate that with tooth, meditation, maybe a form of meditation. So there you go, another vote for humming.

TT:

Tooth brushing or something. Yeah, meditation, yeah. Fascinating. Let's, yeah, well, you know, I kind of, like the humming thing. I really do. It's the, yeah, yeah.

Queenie:

It's something you have to focus on. yes, takes your, your, get you out of your head and focused on something else. And then I've also been reading articles. It must be, you know, end of the year, old Lang Zine kind of stuff. the recognition that, as a, as a nation, we've suffered a trauma.

TT:

Yeah. Yup, it's good. yeah.

Queenie:

And that, yes, and that the world too has been traumatized by this person. yeah, that we, it has had an impact on the psyche of the human race, not for the good.

TT:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Right. yeah. yeah. Everybody is a little squirrely. Yeah. It's the onslaught, the lies, the, you know, not knowing what to believe. It's just... Yep. Exactly. One thing after another.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

Something more bizarre one day after the next, know, it's like, you see it, you watch it with your own face. And yeah, then you hear, that didn't happen. That wasn't me, blah, blah, blah. You didn't hear it right. It's a lie. It's made up. It's like.

TT:

Right. yeah. Right. Talk about gaslighting. Yeah.

Queenie:

Whatever, whatever. then the only other thing that really like fucked me up all this week was that Rob Reiner thing. Rob and Michelle Reiner really just threw me off my pins. Yeah, that was very tragic. Very, very tragic. it's, I, it's, it's,

TT:

I know. so sad. So, so, sad. gosh. Yeah, yeah. For everyone, you know? Yeah.

Queenie:

It highlights the flaws in our mental health system.

TT:

Yes, well, because we criminalize addiction. mean...

Queenie:

He was also just, I guess, had been diagnosed as schizophrenic.

TT:

Boy. Well, and that can also be the result of using lots of drugs. You know, the bad kind, the schedule three ones, not the schedule ones. Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Queenie:

Yeah. Yep. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. The real one's fentanyl. Yeah, right, right. So that very sad, very sad. I just...

Queenie:

Yeah, it was just like such a dichotomy, you know, that you couldn't see any two more opposite human beings and Rob Reiner and Donald Duck.

TT:

Yeah.

Queenie:

So just don't understand.

TT:

They seriously Rob Reiner, but so much joy and light and just so much goodness to this world. Yeah, positive stuff. And yeah, as opposed to the evil one who is everything is is negative. It's tearing people down. It's yeah. Yep. Yep.

Queenie:

Positive, yes.

Queenie:

Angry, it's hateful, spiteful, cruel, just foul. Foul.

TT:

Mm-hmm, yeah.

TT:

But maybe that's the world people want to live in. I don't know. I can't imagine.

Queenie:

So TT what have you consumed today?

TT:

I am back to having a little sativa today because you know I had to clean the house so so I had my Floracal Farms Sativa Pink Lemonade

Queenie:

That's right. Flora Cow. Pink Lemonade! Well, I would guess it would be. I am continuing to enjoy the blue Raz. is Sativa. Mm-hmm. Razamatez. I did. I did indeed need a little perk me up. So, that's where we at. Both Sativa'd up.

TT:

Yes, it's quite yummy. Mm-hmm. You and your blue res. Resmetaz. Yep. Yep. You needed that. Yeah. Yeah, we both are. How about that?

Queenie:

Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

So let's not waste any time. Tee-Tee, let's get to the news. Do you have a story for us today? I wonder what might.

TT:

Yes, I do. What could it possibly be? Well, last week, you know, we had the big story about the schedule change. Well, actually, we had this we did a we did a special report on that because the news came out right after we finished recording our last show. So we did do a special report. But that is all about if you missed our special report, that is all about the.

Queenie:

Yes we did.

TT:

Change in scheduling for cannabis from a schedule three to a schedule one drug, which makes it comparable to ketamine, no longer comparable to things like heroin and fentanyl and very deadly drugs if used improperly. But so this is great news. It was by the pen of the evil one.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

The Sharpie.

TT:

You know, he was, yeah, he was trying to get us not to think about Jeffrey Epstein being his bestie. Right. Yes. So anyhow, there's that news, huge news, and we'll have to wait and see how it plays out. There are a bunch of Republican senators that are all pissed off about it and are going to fight back. But.

Queenie:

And the files that weren't released.

TT:

I think this is a good thing in general for the people who are in the cannabis industry. It will make banking easier for them. It won't have to be a cash business anymore, which is just crazy if you think about it. Like, who uses cash anymore? So that's really good. And the other news, though, is that the Supreme Court.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

Right?

TT:

Decided not to rule on the case brought against it by can of provisions and others. So we're not gonna have any movement there from the Supreme Court. They've decided that's not gonna be one of the ones they look at. I mean, I know they're inundated with cases every year and they only choose a certain number, but I was kind of hoping if that coincided with this, it might've been pretty powerful. But as it is, we'll see, we'll see.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

We'll see. Now that the banks are getting involved, and this is business for the banks, you never know, might bring more pressure to bear.

TT:

Mm-hmm.

TT:

Right. yeah. Yeah, I think so. I think so. think that's, I think it was the businessman that appealed to the orange one. Yeah. Yeah. Yep.

Queenie:

So.

Queenie:

Well, I think they lobbied heavily, right? Cannabis lobby was huge, huge. know, it's, you know, 10, 11 more months before that's supposed to be taking place. So we shall see.

TT:

Yep, we just gotta write it out like everything else. Everything else.

Queenie:

Like every and who knows who knows who knows so much.

TT:

It's, yeah.

Queenie:

I wouldn't even begin to guess what we could be looking at. I have no earthly clue. We could be in Gulags.

TT:

I know it. Yeah, it's, if anybody had said 10 years ago or whatever that we would be here right now, it'd be like, way, Jose. Yeah.

Queenie:

Yeah, that would, yeah.

Queenie:

Well, we were talking with my cousins about my mom had been accepted to go to nursing school at Samaritan and she literally was a day away from reporting when they called her and said, you have so your acne is so bad. we just think it would be best if you waited a year.

TT:

Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

So she somehow got herself over to Memorial and was able to start right away. Yeah, so then my cousin Betsy said, well, that's illegal now, thank God. And I said, Betsy, maybe before 2010? I said it was, but you gotta get with the times, girl. Yeah, it was illegal at one point, but where's your head? Where are we now?

TT:

Wow.

TT:

Wow.

TT:

My goodness. Where are we now? Yeah.

Queenie:

Where are we now?

Queenie:

What did I hear he did? What did he just buy to put on the top of his arch? something with about the bust of Robert E. Lee that was removed from the rotunda of the Capitol for some female, some girl, nobody ever heard of. So he's going to put that he's going to top his arch to Trump with.

TT:

Cheers.

TT:

No! my...

TT:

No.

TT:

Yeah, African American girl. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Queenie:

Robert E. Lee. So he is given the position he deserves as the greatest general in our country's history.

TT:

Good for him. Good for him.

TT:

He was a loser, loser. He lost. A traitor, yeah. Yeah.

Queenie:

There you go.

Queenie:

Can you say traitor? Traitor? Mm-hmm. So this man is just...

TT:

He's doing it just to tweak people like us, that's why. Yeah, don't let him get to you. I know, it's just.

Queenie:

And the Kennedy Center.

TT:

It's like a... Ohhhh.

TT:

I know. yep.

Queenie:

One of the nieces said she the minute he was out of the office she was going to get a jackhammer.

TT:

Special.

Queenie:

And smash his name off. She would climb a ladder and do it herself. the minute the minute it was possible. I think she'd have a lot of help.

TT:

Definitely. yeah. All kinds of big machines. Yeah. Please, Yeah.

Queenie:

I think she'd have a lot of help.

Queenie:

Yeah, people begging for the opportunity to jackhammer something. yeah. Well, maybe they can sell tickets to demolish the arch too. So.

TT:

Good God. I can't even believe we're talking about this. know, it's just, it does seem like a, it's dystopia. We are in, we are in.

Queenie:

A horrible dream. It's just, we're going to have a coin next year with his fucking face on it.

TT:

Dystopians.

TT:

No, I don't think we're going to actually have that.

Queenie:

Uh, think again? Oh yeah!

TT:

Really? Doesn't Congress have to approve it? Well, yeah, they're useless. Silly, Right. Where have you been? Yeah.

Queenie:

TT, I'll say the same thing I said to my cousin. Tap, tap, tap, tap. Where have you been? In a perfect world, in an old timey world. Old timey, how quaint. To think there was a balance of powers.

TT:

Tiny. in a world that makes sense.

TT:

Yeah.

Queenie:

Point.

TT:

Well, how socialist.

Queenie:

So this is where we are right now.

TT:

Socialist communist.

Queenie:

Trumpinist, Trumpist, bleh.

TT:

Trumpiness. Well, least the pot sales surged, so that's good for the... We don't need to worry about that, right? yeah.

Queenie:

Well, but as long as he's in office, I think we can guarantee that cannabis sales will surge. Absolutely. my God.

Queenie:

So, well, we'll keep an eye on that then I guess, huh?

TT:

Yeah, we just have to keep seeing what unfolds.

Queenie:

It's time to play TT's favorite game. Coulda, shoulda, woulda, if they were. Did they really or not? Do this under the influence of cannabis. Or is it ca-ca with a K?

TT:

Hahaha

Queenie:

You know, after we said that, kaka with a K, I'm like, did we really spell it with a C?

TT:

Yes.

Queenie:

I was, it's one of those moments, like it's like one of those times when you look at a word that you've just written down and you're like, did I just spell that right? Something you've written 100 million times and then you look at it it just doesn't look right. And it's right. I guess I could have gone C or K with kaka.

TT:

Yeah. What does it mean? Yeah. Right. Right.

TT:

Okay, well.

Queenie:

But it did make sense when I saw the K, I thought, interesting. Hard K, hard C, but I did react to the K. I don't even know why I brought that up. I don't know, I don't know. if, TT, I think I messed up last week too. I think you got both wrong.

TT:

Hard K, but it could be a hard C as well. Okay. I don't know either.

TT:

Kaka.

TT:

You did?

TT:

I think you're right.

Queenie:

And I think I gave you a 50-50 split. But that's just me being benevolent, I suppose. You're welcome. It is the holiday season. It is just the holiday season, my dear. Let's see how you do today. two situations. TG's got to determine, did this really happen? Was cannabis involved in this?

TT:

Yes you did. Yes you did.

TT:

Thank you, Your Highness. Thank you, Your Grace. Well, let's see how I do today.

Queenie:

Incident or event or is this just some kaka, c or k whatever you prefer. So the first the first is officials burned tons of confiscated drugs in a field on a windy day accidentally getting an entire village high. Reporters and villagers reported feeling dizzy and pretty damn amazing.

TT:

Okay.

Queenie:

Did this happen? Or is this C or K kaka?

TT:

I think it happened.

Queenie:

TT thinks that this actually happened. So TT, why do you think this happened?

TT:

It just seems like something like I know I've heard of large quantities of cannabis being destroyed once it's been confiscated. to me, it seems like I think I've heard of it being burned too. So I don't know if a whole town would get high, but it would be pretty great to live in there.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm. Okay.

Queenie:

Well, well, I'm happy to report you're correct.

TT:

Yay!

Queenie:

This did actually happen in Indonesia in 2015. Yeah, so they were downwind of the cannabis incineration disposal unit on a particularly windy day. Yeah, baby, everybody was feeling great.

TT:

Indonesia, okay.

TT:

It for them goodness

Queenie:

Pretty amazing, I think was the quote.

TT:

Feeling, feeling strange. I don't know why, but all of a sudden I'm just not as bothered by things. What's happening? Life is good. Yeah.

Queenie:

Everything's looking up. Suddenly.

Queenie:

That's right, keep looking on the upside. situation numera... two.

TT:

Number two.

Queenie:

Numero 2. Numero 2. Ra ra ra. A company released can-a-bumps, snortable cannabis powder marketed like cocaine, causing industry-wide outrage and likely forcing the company to pull the product. Is this true or a caca?

TT:

Why would you do that?

Queenie:

I don't I

TT:

Why would you want to snort it? I don't know, I guess it's...

Queenie:

Marketed like cocaine. Well, I don't think you market cocaine, do we?

TT:

Yeah, well, well, but people use a lot of cocaine. So, getting a bump, I don't know. I think it's possible, but I'm going to say no.

Queenie:

Okay.

Queenie:

This sounds pretendish to you or kaka.

TT:

It's unpretendish. just like what would it take to turn it into a powder that you could snort? I don't know. It just feels like an awful lot of work.

Queenie:

For something that maybe there's not even a demand for. I don't know. So TT does not believe that this is valid. Nobody's done this. This is kaka. It sounds like kaka to TT, but tis not kaka.

TT:

Right, right.

TT:

It sounds like a cockatoo.

TT:

It

TT:

Really

Queenie:

No, there was a company that in 2021 actually did release something, was planning to release something known as Kana Bumps.

Queenie:

Powder and I guess the appeal was you could use it like cocaine Why that's appealing? I don't know but

TT:

Why? Well, yeah, and like, it's not just like, how do they powderize it? What? I'm just thinking, yeah, whatever. Yeah.

Queenie:

A... you're out of my... well I've never...

TT:

No.

Queenie:

Snorted, nothing. So I just can't, I would imagine that it would be irritating because I just, you know, I'm thinking of the like pre, most pre-ground, you can pulverize it more I suppose, but even just the most finely ground cannabis is, I would be like an irritant.

TT:

Yeah.

TT:

You would think, you know, the other, but the other thing is it's, it's going in through your mucus membranes, right? Like going in, it probably is a very quick high. And maybe, maybe that's what's attractive about it. If you're not going to smoke then yeah, yeah, yeah. That I could see that. Yeah. Being.

Queenie:

Yeah.

Queenie:

Maybe. Maybe that was the, what they were trying to promote, right? More.

TT:

Something people might be interested in, but.

Queenie:

I guess if you're brainstorming, nothing sounds silly. they did not, fortunately did not really see itself to market. So, Bitty 50 once again, Bitty 50. So good job, good job. reals, for reals, she's at 50 50. And this is our last episode of the year.

TT:

Right. Okay.

TT:

Wow. Fitty, Yep.

TT:

For real, for real this time. For reals.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm.

TT:

Yeah.

Queenie:

The end of 2025.

TT:

You

Queenie:

We should have done a retrospective. dear. I can barely remember what we've talked about when we get done.

TT:

Well,

Queenie:

So TT, are you ready for this week's fuck it? What are we going to add to the fuck it list?

TT:

I can't wait to hear what's coming next. I love this list. I do.

Queenie:

You forgot us.

TT:

You

Queenie:

How about, I forgot what we were.

Queenie:

Stop, it was stop.

TT:

Stop pretending you like people that you don't. Right?

Queenie:

I'm like, stop prepend, prepending. Stop pretending to like people you don't.

TT:

Pending.

TT:

That's a good one. How, but yeah.

Queenie:

That's.

Queenie:

That's brutal. I mean, here I say that's brutal, but I understand. I mean, I guess it's a aspirational wish for me. Or is that a double aspirational is wish? It's an aspirational goal.

TT:

Because...

TT:

Yeah.

TT:

Yeah.

TT:

Well.

TT:

A is aspirational as well.

Queenie:

I don't know. You know what I mean. my god. I could only hope, I could only hope that one day I could be genuine. But how would that, what would that look like though?

TT:

You aspire to it.

TT:

Well that's what I'm trying to figure out. I mean, I am a person who generally tries to be kind to people, you know? Like, I'm having a conversation.

Queenie:

Okay, so not intent, but not intentionally mean is another way of being, right?

TT:

Right. Yeah. But, you could just be neutral and say, hmm, I guess you could say something like, that isn't my experience, where I, I, this doesn't, this isn't really one of my interests or something like that, I guess. I don't know. You're crashing bore I don't know. What do you say? How do you, I guess I don't have to be quite so pleasant. Like I'm always, you know, affirming other people and smiling and.

Queenie:

Hmm.

TT:

You know, engaging fully and listening and all that stuff. I guess you could just kind of be like, hmm. Yeah.

Queenie:

I guess I'm out of here. Bye! Stop pretending to like people you...

TT:

I don't know.

TT:

But I think is I like most people. Do I? Is that an honest statement?

Queenie:

Pretending to like people you don't. Like what does pretend, what does that look like though? What is pretending to like people look, is it like fawning all over them? More like gushy, like fake. Like I don't wanna be.

TT:

Think of anybody I really

TT:

I think it's being a little gushy, you know, like,

TT:

Fake us. Yeah, like, like, yeah, it's nice to see you. When really, it's not. I'm so I'm so glad we ran into each other. When it's like, I want to run the other direction is just I just

Queenie:

So what's the opposite of that? dear. If I'd seen you two seconds earlier, we could have avoided this.

TT:

I don't know.

Queenie:

I would have pretended not to have seen you.

TT:

I can't hear you, I can't see you. Oh, look at the time. I've got to run.

Queenie:

Was someone calling me?

Queenie:

Jeez,

TT:

I think maybe it's just a quick nod, a stop in chat. I don't know.

Queenie:

I don't know. Like, hmm.

Queenie:

I mean, I've certainly felt that from others.

TT:

Hi, how's it going? How's it going? just a, yeah.

TT:

I think what's okay, part of what's built into us as women is pleasing other people. And so it's just.

Queenie:

Yes.

Queenie:

Being

TT:

The grooves are so deep that we just automatically, that's our default. You know what I mean?

Queenie:

Right. Well, I don't know anything.

TT:

We're having trouble even figuring out what this looks like. Come on.

Queenie:

I I've tried to be assertive in the past and I come off sounding like I feel like a shrieking bitch. And I'm treated like I've lost my mind or I'm out of control. And then I'm like, why can other people do this and I can't?

TT:

I've.

TT:

Huh. I know. And it's like, you're doing is.

TT:

The same thing with me with setting boundaries, right? What's gotten into you?

Queenie:

Right, or trying, yes, trying to do something like that. Yeah.

TT:

I'm trying to preserve myself from the onslaught of the rest of the world. Yeah, no, it's okay for everybody else.

Queenie:

Well, let's see.

TT:

That's a good one. think that's something we'll have to check in with each other on.

TT:

And to see if there's, we, especially in the next couple of weeks, encounter any social situations where we're just like, I don't like this person. And I, what am I, what kind of signals am I giving off here? Maybe it's more honest to just say, yeah, you know what? I'm not that into you. I don't know.

Queenie:

Yeah.

Queenie:

Or maybe in a social setting, you have friends that say, don't you come over tonight? So and so and so and so are coming. And that would be an opportunity to say, you know what, I really don't care for them. So I don't think that's gonna be a good thing for me.

TT:

Mmm.

TT:

That's not gonna be a good fit for us, yeah.

TT:

See, don't, when you said, I don't care for them, I can't even imagine saying that to some, like if they were somebody's really close friends, I really don't care for them. I would just make up some lame excuse.

Queenie:

That's the only way I can...

Queenie:

Hmm.

Queenie:

Right.

Queenie:

Which is pretending to like people you don't.

TT:

Right. It is. it's, yeah. Yeah.

Queenie:

So guess this is harder to do than it appears. It sounds easy enough, I guess I would ask if anybody has any practical advice on this one. I can't put myself, I can't see an active way to.

Queenie:

Assert this. It's more not doing. Like I'd be hiding from the person.

TT:

No, me either. I guess it's more, yeah.

TT:

Run away! Yeah.

Queenie:

Yeah, run away!

TT:

It just feels so wrong. It feels bad. Because then I'd be like, you know, full of guilt. Yeah. I was, I really wasn't very nice to that person. All they were doing was trying to say hello.

Queenie:

Feels icky.

TT:

I don't know, sometimes I think it's better as long as you're not. Okay, here's the difference for me. If you don't like someone fine, you know, if you have to work with them, you have to work with them. You can't be, you know.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. You don't have to like everybody and they don't have to like you. Everybody doesn't have to like you.

TT:

Right. Right. And you still can be civil to people without. Right. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Right.

Queenie:

That's the thing. Civil and polite and not backstab and, but that has not been my experience.

Queenie:

In the workplace, should say, especially.

TT:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. People backstab all the time.

Queenie:

Ss-

Queenie:

And I, you know, like I said, I wasn't brought up that way. I wasn't, I just, you know, and I was, was ill prepared. Ill prepared for that environment.

TT:

I know.

TT:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

TT:

I know, and it's a shock when it happens. It's like...

Queenie:

Shock, a real astund to the system. It really is.

TT:

Especially when it happens, like this happened at the church I belonged to and I was like, what? Wait a minute, don't we have some like ground rules here? Aren't there some commandments or something? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, and it's like, it's a huge blow. It's like, okay.

Queenie:

Yeah. Really? Mm-hmm. Don't we have at least a basis of understanding? Like, kind of on the same page?

Queenie:

Yeah, it really shakes your faith in mankind. It's been tested so many times. So very many times in my life, but I've always come back for more. More and more. Yes, I try to give people the benefit of the doubt all the time.

TT:

It does.

TT:

Mm-hmm.

TT:

Yeah, because that's what we do.

TT:

Well, and I think that what you do though is you just don't spend time with them. That's the way to handle it. You don't invite them because you feel like you have to to something or you just say, I prefer not to go to that. If you know there's going to be...

Queenie:

Correct.

Queenie:

Correct. feel pressured to invite, like if you were having a group of people, feel pressure to include someone that you don't care for, you know, to be able to say, it's...

TT:

Mm-hmm.

TT:

Right, right, just because, they're part of the group? Well, yeah, no. I guess you could say I'm finding it difficult to be around them right now, know, something like that. I'm just finding it hard to, I just, I can't absorb their negativity. I don't know, something like that.

Queenie:

They don't bring me any joy. So, well, that's something that's going to be interesting.

Queenie:

Right, right. So, well that's definitely an interesting one. We'll have to keep an eye on that for sure. I'm still not shaving the old legs.

TT:

Mm-hmm. Yeah, we have to...

TT:

Well, I told you broke down. I'm not going to until I have to go back to class again.

Queenie:

Well, I mean, you know, you were in public. They say, tap, tap.

TT:

Exactly. was like, I was like, nobody saw that. you?

Queenie:

So the holiday week is upon us.

Queenie:

I know all your adult males will be home and they're partners of the exception of Lisa. I know, but you'll have a wonderful time with your fam.

TT:

Tis.

TT:

They will.

TT:

I know, I'm gonna miss her.

TT:

It'll be good to be together. It always is. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. No little girly girls.

Queenie:

Yes, it's going to be very low key here. Low key childless.

Queenie:

No, we'll probably celebrate together the following weekend.

TT:

And you also celebrated last weekend or two weekends, whatever it was, yeah. That's all right, mine was at it earlier, so.

Queenie:

We did, yeah, there's no...

Queenie:

He's backing up now.

Queenie:

I mean it.

Queenie:

See you soon.

Queenie:

But Shiny Boy is home this year, this is great.

TT:

That'll be fun. That'll be just, it's actually kind of nice that you're going to have him to yourself, kind of. Yeah.

Queenie:

Yes. Yes. So it'll be great. Long time coming with a lovely young lady who I consider my daughter-in-law. She's someone who was part of our, you know, grew up with my daughter and Sean in middle school, high school. And when on vacation with us, I consider her part of our family. it's I this is a blessing. I never thought I'd.

TT:

It's been a long time coming.

TT:

Mm-hmm. that's wonderful. Shoot.

TT:

Yep. Yep.

Queenie:

Have. So, a lot can happen in a year, folks. So, keep the faith. Keep the faith. That's all I can say because...

TT:

I know, I know.

TT:

A lot can happen, that is true. Yep, yep.

TT:

Good things do happen.

Queenie:

Good things do happen. Sometimes it takes a while. This little shit is pulling papers out of the wastebasket under me.

TT:

Mm-hmm.

TT:

Someone needs some attention.

Queenie:

I have to go over there early tomorrow. I'll do it. that reminds me. I got to send a note to daycare and I have to call the bus garage and cancel her trip tomorrow morning.

TT:

So you can go to mass.

Queenie:

So I can take her to mass. So I can sit at mass.

TT:

Maybe you'll be filled with the Holy Spirit. Sorry, I couldn't say that. was a straight...

Queenie:

HAHAHAHA

Queenie:

He tried. I'll give credit for that.

TT:

I tried.

Queenie:

I'll give you big points for that. That was very, very, very good. Almost sincere, but there's a good try. Ra-ra. Get an A for effort. Lord have mercy. Maybe I can have my confession listened to.

TT:

You

TT:

Want to reach out, my hands around her throat and squeeze!

Queenie:

Watch this.

TT:

Do you still have yours somewhere? Scapular.

Queenie:

My what?

Queenie:

I don't have that, but I do have my little white rosary from my first communion in its case.

TT:

Wow! Cool!

Queenie:

It's, you know, almost an ancient relic. It's a relic. Yeah, how long does have something have to be to be ancient? It's 62 years old, 63, 63 years old.

TT:

Yes, ancient relics.

TT:

I don't know.

Queenie:

So yeah, little white, little white rosary.

TT:

Yeah, I had a bracelet that was a rosary. I still have that. It had the beads around and then it had a little crucifix and a little miraculous medal on it. I still have that. But I don't think I have my rosary. I think I have my scapula though. I think I have it in my, I think it's in my jewelry box, the one that used to have a little ballerina on it, but she broke off. Someone.

Queenie:

I don't know.

Queenie:

Cool beans.

Queenie:

Yeah. I don't recall having any of those left.

TT:

Broker off.

TT:

Hmm.

Queenie:

I don't think I have my, I might have my daily missile too.

Queenie:

From First Communion.

TT:

I loved, you got the little purse,

TT:

My parents had a picture of me taking at the Sears Portrait Studio in my first communion, yes, and they liked it so much they hung it. made like, they made a large one and hung it up. And I have it still. I should go grab it and show it to you.

Queenie:

In your first communion regalia.

Queenie:

I made 36 by 72. Lifesize. Aww.

Queenie:

Was it a double one? Were you also in profile up in the corner?

TT:

No, no, no. was just no, no, When I was like this and my rosary beads were very artfully hung.

Queenie:

Yes, yes. As they will be once again.

TT:

Not me.

Queenie:

Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope. Well, that's the other thing. The funeral industry is going through a tremendous change because fewer and fewer people are having traditional funerals with wakes and coffins and all that good stuff. More and more people are opting for cremation and then, you know, life memorials or celebrations of life and fewer church services. It's, it's pretty dramatic to change.

TT:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

TT:

Right.

TT:

Right, right, yeah.

TT:

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

So, but I'm still tending toward natural burial. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. That or composting.

TT:

Natural burial, yeah.

Queenie:

Can throw me around a bush or something.

TT:

Well, it takes a lot of energy to cremate someone, which I didn't realize.

Queenie:

Yes, and it's bad for the environment because you're creating, you have to use natural gas. Use natural gas to fire the crematormian. Well, it's flames. And byproduct of natural gas is carbon.

TT:

Yeah.

TT:

To get it hot enough. Okay. Yeah.

Queenie:

Something or other height, don't know, whatever depletes the, well, and not good for the ozone layer and all that stuff. Although they are building brand new crematoriums at Albany Rural Cemetery.

TT:

Yeah, black smoke.

TT:

Mm-hmm. OK.

TT:

They are. Wow. Yeah, I can imagine. There's only two in the whole capital district. Yeah, I was shocked to learn that.

Queenie:

Because the demand has risen. There only two crematoriums, Troy and Albany.

Queenie:

The Stanley Gardner Crematorium in Troy. Yeah. Yeah, and they're running like nonstop.

TT:

Yep, that's the one my mom went to. Just like a bakery.

Queenie:

A conveyor belt. Get them in and get them out, folks. Get them in and get them out. Yeah, brand new. was down there the other day when I picked up the book. The book for Dan. but yeah, in this whole region, those are the two.

TT:

Cheers.

TT:

The book.

TT:

That's good that they're getting more, because I don't know. Yeah, how do they do that?

TT:

A lot of people, very populous.

Queenie:

They were hiring for crematorium operators too.

Queenie:

It's a hot job.

TT:

There can't be a whole lot to it though, you just push some buttons.

Queenie:

You gotta do some work before and after. Well, you're dusting out the cremains and then you've got to sift them.

TT:

You do.

TT:

The cremains, yeah.

TT:

Home.

Queenie:

Well, because there are metal pieces and stuff.

TT:

Like feelings.

Queenie:

Gold teeth.

TT:

Titanium hips.

Queenie:

Hips pacemakers.

TT:

Wow, yeah.

Queenie:

Yeah, all those things. Shoulders now.

Queenie:

You don't think of all that. It's all left behind. And then they have to grind up any big chunks.

TT:

Now.

Queenie:

And why do I know this much about being a crematory operator?

TT:

Because you've always been sort of morbidly curious about it.

Queenie:

Yeah.

TT:

Yeah, you have a version to it. don't like it.

Queenie:

No, I don't.

Queenie:

Truth be told

Queenie:

But I've accepted it.

TT:

I've never forgot. I will never forget. Yes!

TT:

Going through the little receiving line and then there is coffee.

TT:

Dairy cream!

Queenie:

Creamora

TT:

You picked it up, offered it to me and said, cremains.

TT:

Hello.

Queenie:

I told you I do not behave well in high pressure situations full of grief.

Queenie:

It's It's very... It's very triggering.

TT:

I don't either because you make me laugh. And then I get in trouble.

TT:

The one who has to pretend that I'm wrecked with sobs of grief. Not laughing my ass off.

Queenie:

Well, yes, I wasn't happy that he was just in the trunk

Queenie:

If you recall.

TT:

Where else did you expect to be buckled in the front seat?

Queenie:

Brian did.

TT:

You

Queenie:

Brian drove Gail home.

TT:

She was buckled in.

Queenie:

Yeah, she and who went with him? Someone did father pro. no Carlo Karl drove with them came What drove with him down to DC? No, no from where the hell why were they driving Gail?

TT:

Get there okay

Queenie:

Wait a minute, she died in... but she's cremated here.

TT:

Yeah, but where was she interred? Was she interred or does he have her at home?

Queenie:

No, her cremains are interred up at National.

TT:

But that wasn't right after.

Queenie:

Why would he have her in his car? Why was Brian driving Gail around?

Queenie:

Because they had to pick her up. She got cremated right afterwards, so they picked her up. So he and Carlo drove her. I don't know, they were driving her somewhere and they like went to a McDonald's or something. mean, they had...

TT:

Yeah, from the... okay.

Queenie:

Made all sorts of jokes.

Queenie:

But yeah, the header's strapped in.

Queenie:

And then told us that story. Remember?

TT:

Yes, thank you.

Queenie:

Hate guy dropped her all over the place.

TT:

Yeah.

Queenie:

Sometimes you end up where you're supposed to be, I guess.

Queenie:

You just end up where you're supposed to be.

Queenie:

So, I don't know. I'm snotting up a storm over here. Yes, maybe the humming might have loosened things for me. Yeah, because I've got a pile here.

TT:

Get a hum. Hum. maybe you got things going. Yeah. Yeah.

TT:

You

Queenie:

See all that holistic, all those holistic suggestions.

TT:

Yeah, folder all.

Queenie:

So other than Fodderall and Fiddle-E-D, any other company expected? No.

TT:

No, I think, like I said, Rosetta will probably stop over and pick up all her presents and then...

TT:

Dyson and Richard coming, did I tell you that for dinner? And I invited Gail, but she's having some friends over, elderly friends over, one kid here, one can't, I don't know, move.

Queenie:

Nice!

Queenie:

Have a blast.

TT:

If I, yeah, they will. so yeah, it'll just be, and Mimi is coming, Marty's sister. Yeah. Yeah, that's it. Nothing unexpected. So, yeah.

Queenie:

Great. Great.

Queenie:

I'll be with two of my adult children and their partners and my mother and Dan. Yes. It'll be very weird without the kids. So, but my mother will be there, so.

TT:

That'll be fun. It'll be weird without the kids. mean, yeah, yeah.

TT:

It's almost like having one of the kids. Yeah, this is my first without mumsy, so.

Queenie:

It's almost like having them all there all at once.

Queenie:

Mm-hmm. Yep. Yep.

Queenie:

Big change.

TT:

Mm-hmm.

Queenie:

I'm glad your kids are all able to be there for you.

TT:

Me too. Yep, me too.

Queenie:

Yeah.

Queenie:

Yeah, my cousins were just saying, let's see, so my uncle Bob was 2011 and Aunt Mickey was 2018, I think she said, they said 2017 or 18.

Queenie:

It just seems like yesterday we were all together.

TT:

Yeah, yeah, I know that's the thing.

TT:

It's like even now I think to myself, was I really there for three and a half years? Yes, I was. It's so weird, yeah.

Queenie:

I know, right?

Queenie:

Yeah. And then, you know, the whole thing about like, I don't know about you, but like 2020 and 2021 are like smushed. Like I can't differentiate one year from the next or even put little 2022 in there too. And I read an article that that's a very common.

TT:

Yeah.

TT:

Mm-mm. Mm-mm.

TT:

Mm-hmm.

TT:

Yeah, it has to be. We were like in a time warp. It was a really weird thing. I went from, right, and I went from pandemic and then finally, you know, we're getting out of that. And then I came and lived with my mom. So it felt like a really, in some ways, it felt longer, you know, because it was still the isolation, you know.

Queenie:

Think with people, that there's an ill-defined period of time, yep.

Queenie:

Next. Yeah. Yep. Yep.

Queenie:

Yep, yep, yep.

TT:

Ahhhh... Yep.

Queenie:

Get it. So, alright, well, we hope everybody had a great holiday and...

TT:

Yes, and New Year's will be coming up next. Yeah.

Queenie:

This is our right. So we'll next be with you in the new here. It'll be 2026.

TT:

The new y'all. Yay!

Queenie:

Anything special for 2026 you're looking forward to TT.

TT:

I'm looking forward to our trip to the Dominican Republic and a trip to Mexico and then our trip to the Cape. The Cape of Cod. Yes, yes, it's going to be a good year.

Queenie:

Tremendous, yes.

Queenie:

It will be a great year. So on that note, I'll say bye bye. Happy New Year everybody.

TT:

Bye bye. Happy New Year.

Queenie:

Erp.